Finally a professor in the “fashion city of Düsseldorf” (Tote Hosen): Campino
Photo: dpa
The world has finally gone crazy. The final proof of this was provided last Monday: Campino, whose real name is Andreas Frege, 61, is the “singer” of the popular hit combo Die Toten Hosen and has become particularly behaviorally problematic over the last 30 years as a social democratic minimal thinker and a 100% reliable supporter “Visiting Professor” at the Heinrich Heine University in Düsseldorf.
The Germany magazine “Der Spiegel” describes the media prankster, who hasn’t exactly gained fame as a top thinker, as a “punk,” but that doesn’t mean anything. The “Spiegel” also famously calls the TV mascot Richard David Precht a “philosopher” without batting an eyelash and without any hint of shame. And the talking machine Robert Habeck, the German Bundestag’s best lubricant, is seriously called a “provocateur” by his publisher. Words come easy.
But back to the actual topic: Campino, professor, Heinrich Heine, university. You have to read the crucial sentence, this in fact completely insane sentence, again very slowly so that you can really believe it, because it is extremely disturbing news for the minority of people who are currently still somewhat capable of thinking and have normal feelings : Campino becomes a visiting professor at Heinrich Heine University. “According to the university, the demand for the lectures is so great that it only raffles off the tickets online” (WDR).
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Not only does the most naked and dark confusion apparently prevail here, in the most uninhibited society of fools and spectacles, but also the validity of the long-disputed “entropy law” of physics, according to which all development processes on the globe lead to increasing chaos, has now been proven beyond a doubt.
If the news is true – and it is true, because it was not just some ill-reputed fake news slinger, but reputable press agencies that proudly announced it – we will have to prepare ourselves for the fact that many things in our society will change drastically nothing will be as it once was. So it doesn’t matter at all whether Dieter Bohlen’s tweets will simply be included in the next edition of Theodor W. Adorno’s “Minima Moralia” from Daffke or whether Joko and Klaas will receive the Nobel Prize for ideology criticism this year.
Because the floodgates are fully open, so to speak. Now practically anything is possible: Mathias Döpfner becomes editor of the historical-critical complete edition of the works of Karl Kraus. Barbara Schöneberger discovers the magic of silence. Jakob Augstein becomes chairman of the German-Israeli Society. And why not? Anything goes.
The title of the “lecture,” which Campino is expected to give at the end of April, is: “Everyone has something to say. The cacophony of our time.” A well chosen title! The man undoubtedly knows his way around making unpleasant-sounding noises (cacophony). And say whatever the others say, just more clumsily, and share it publicly, he can do that too.
In a society in which nothing means anything anymore, in which limitless opportunism, the openly expressed total agreement with everything without exception and the permanent willingness to stick one’s own face into any camera at hand at any time are considered the central virtues and in which one If an unqualified knilch can become Federal Chancellor, a Campino can logically also become a “visiting professor”. “Before Campino, Helmut Schmidt, Juli Zeh, Wolf Biermann, Siegfried Lenz, Joschka Fischer, Antje Vollmer, Cardinal Karl Lehmann, Ulrich Wickert, Joachim Gauck and most recently Klaus-Maria Brandauer were Heine visiting professors” (“Der Spiegel”). The only people missing are Lars Eidinger, Ulf Poschardt and Erika Steinbach.
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