Die gute Kolumne – »Villarriba« oder »Villabajo«?

Rock bands recommend purchasing herbal liqueurs that smell like hair conditioners. Football goalkeepers praise the quality of undrinkable beers and recommend that I visit dubious betting shops. A television talk show host praises the taste of the world’s largest food company’s products, which consist primarily of sugar and artificial flavorings. Film actresses encourage me to buy strong-smelling colognes. Pop singers call for the consumption of disgusting instant pasta sauces. Writers and car factory owners recommend choosing unpleasant parties.

And those watching and listening to them immediately do as they were told. They willingly buy and consume food that would not deserve that name in a reasonably civilized world. They voluntarily spray and wet their bodies with foul-smelling liquids. And in elections they choose politicians who ensure that everything except their own bank balance declines: the level of civilization, environmental protection standards, social security (well, let’s say better: what’s left of it), the measure in solidarity with those disadvantaged by this society, the level of medical care and general life expectancy.

The good column

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Thomas Blum fundamentally disagrees with the prevailing so-called reality. He won’t be able to change her for the time being, but he can reprimand her, admonish her or, if necessary, give her a beating. So that the bad begins to retreat. We stand in solidarity with his fight against reality. Therefore, from now on, “The Good Column” will appear here on Mondays. Only the best quality for the best readers! The collected texts can be found at: dasnd.de/diegute

The question of why people believe that a disgusting analogue cheese is a noble and delicious product just because it was advertised to them in an advertisement by a grinning TV comedy uncle – or why they believe that a German neo-Nazi party is improving the state of the world, just because the operator of a social media platform, which is primarily a “safe space for racists, sexists and anti-Semites” (“Spiegel”), is addicted to profiling left an AI-generated propaganda phrase salad to a reactionary newspaper cannot be answered satisfactorily.

Many people seem to assume that bad comedians who tell stale jokes on television have a particularly keen sense of the quality of cheese. Or that egomaniacal pain in the ass who aggressively live out their narcissism in questionable media are characterized by a particularly sharp mind and a particularly strong love for people. I can assure you: neither is the case.

The fact is: Most people are unable to distinguish between right-wing extremist propaganda, satire, advertising (“product information”), journalism, conspiracy nonsense and various mixed forms of these (“Focus”, “Welt”, “Nius”, “NZZ”) differentiate. They simply believe everything that any familiar face from film and television tells them. It is always important to remember that we are dealing with a German internet and television audience that, for decades, could not be dissuaded from the idea that they could apply for an apartment on ARD’s “Lindenstrasse”. The same audience stubbornly called travel agencies again and again and expressed an urgent desire to book a vacation in the Spanish villages of Villarriba and Villabajo, which only existed in a commercial for dishwashing liquid.

I am therefore not sure whether, in a better future, a legal regulation should not be introduced that makes comprehensive media literacy training mandatory for all citizens. In any case, one thing is certain: it will hardly be possible to prevent the fact that some people want to make people believe that shit is gold and others believe that shit.

But maybe it’s me who has a flaw. To return to the cheese example: Ever since I held a pack of Gouda in my hands in a supermarket during the last World Cup, with the face of Andreas Gabalier grinning back at me and which I therefore put back in the fridge in disgust, I have not bought any food produced by this company more. The manufacturing companies have to learn at some point that not everything is acceptable.

Of course I know that in a society that is fundamentally wrong, you always buy the wrong thing, and that the mere banal act of shopping itself is ultimately a counter-revolutionary act. I also know that you cannot change a capitalistically organized state by staying away from the wrong cheese and buying the supposedly right cheese. Nevertheless, I insist that the faces of people who produce cultural products whose main effect is the constant proliferation of unleashed penis humbling and nationalistic beer tent roars should have no place either on food packaging or in the reporting of even halfway reputable media. But given the way the world is set up right now, I wouldn’t be surprised if such people were soon asked by the “Welt” editorial team for a “guest article.”